How I learned to respect myself.

I can remember the exact moment when I thought “wow, my body is actually quite amazing”. 

I was on a 6-mile run in the hills, and it was the longest one I’d managed to that date. I had, for the first time in my life, respect for my body and what it was capable of doing. 

 Writing this now is actually reminding me again of my “wow moment”. I’m not sure if it’s because I really did hit rock bottom last year. I was unable to do anything for myself, I was so physically weak, my body was really on its way out, and now I was running!! I’m not going to say I “bounced back”, far from it.

Another chance. 

In the early stages, I had to have a rest from sitting up watching TV. It was a slow process, and I never thought I’d walk again, let alone run. 

I remember celebrating with the nurses when I was able to walk to the toilet unaided. Thinking back, this actually scares me, how little I could do. 

Had I been given another chance? 

I used to exercise because I had to, it was an addiction, but now I was enjoying it. Now I had this newfound respect for myself, I began listening to what my body needed (i.e. rest, more food), as I’d ignored that for decades.

These thoughts influenced me to fuel my body, which is a completely opposite mindset to when you’re in the grips of anorexia. I’ve just realised now that I abused my body, took it for granted. 

We only get one, if you look after it, it will look after you. Sorry body. Sadly it is a vicious cycle; 

• feel rubbish
• don’t care about yourself
• no respect
• merely surviving
• cover-up and hide
• recluse 

Which creates low self-worth, low self-esteem, low confidence and you wake up and do it all over again. 

Negative thoughts and coping methods.

I paid too much attention to my negative thoughts. The more I “fed them”, the more it became like a snowball effect, and a small thought turned into a massive issue.

I did a lot of work with Walking With My Bear around my confidence and self-esteem (as I’ve mentioned before) as it’s never really been there, I suppose. What confidence I had was quite literally knocked out of me in past relationships. 

I came across as confident, but that was the drink. Sober, I was a train wreck, so drinking was my go-to coping method. 

When you are that low, you don’t care, and my body seemed to be the last thing I was bothered about. You cannot start respecting your body until you start looking after it.

So how do we make a start towards gaining body respect? 

I find having a “tool” at hand helps me to deal with potential situations that may trigger your old, unhelpful ways of coping.

It’s a slow process as is everything in recovery, sadly. But I promise you it’s worth it. Start small and think of it as an investment in yourself. 

Do little, nice things for yourself (even if it’s brushing your teeth better or moisturising – I even found this hard at first) you won’t feel the benefit straight away. Still, the more you do, the better you feel. 

Go for a short walk or sit outside, slowly build yourself up. Don’t run before you can walk, I wanted to be able to do things yesterday, but it doesn’t happen like that, accept that, or else it sets you up to fail. Then you end up beating yourself up because you’ve not achieved what you expected. 

If you are unfortunately at rock bottom, it took you a long time to get there and a lot of practice. It makes sense then that this process will take time, too, both mentally and physically. 

Your mindset won’t change overnight. 

But when you start getting there, you achieve peace with yourself.

Once I started eating better and listening to hunger cues, I had more energy. I was getting stronger, getting mentally happier and therefore had more interest in everyday life. 

Your food intake is massively important for physical and mental reasons.

Slowly I started enjoying things and slowly pushed myself to do more. It felt good to be living. Fueling your body with healthy food is so important for physical recovery and fueling for your brain and mood recovery. 

80% of your serotonin levels (the happy hormone) comes from your stomach. Nutrition for your mental health is very underrated. 

Your body’s been through hell and then some, that’s why it takes time. “Working” on yourself and self-care is not selfish, you are investing time into living a happy and fulfilling life.

Are you able to monitor the times you feel negative about yourself? 

I was reading over the notes I took during some of my sessions, and the following may be of some use. 

I once sat for 60 seconds and wrote down any thoughts that popped into my head. They were all negative and critical about me. 

How much time did I waste being critical of me? 

I must continuously be beating myself up. Next to each thought, I had written down, I applied the method of asking if the thought was true and was it appropriate? 

You invest so much time into saying these things to yourself, that you genuinely believe them. However, when it’s written down, you can see them for what they really are – false, inappropriate statements with no evidence to back them up. 

These negative thoughts do us so much harm when they are irrelevant and not worthy of rising to or acting on. 

Focus on what you value, the important things in your life.

Focus your energy on positive things in your life and appreciate what you have, not what you haven’t. 

It’s all about the here and now not what’s happened (because you cannot change the past) and you can’t predict the future, but you can influence it, so take action. 

Focus on the day and don’t compare yourself to what you used to be able to do. 

I did this a lot, and once I accepted that the progress was going to be slow, I became happy and content with the small steps I was achieving. 

Something is better than nothing.

Thanks for reading. I’ll be back soon. 

Jenny x

Chasing your dream, goal, ambition, pursuit of success etc etc can be an exhilarating experience, and for some, a rollercoaster of a ride. But is there a danger we can be drawn in too deep, and not maintain our health and wellbeing, with a risk of injury, whether it be to the mind, body, soul or business/financial wealth?

I want to share an example of a recent training day pulling my trye, as it’s the principle of taking a step back to all aspects of life and business where I feel it matters.

My training day target – to walk 40-45 miles over the Derbyshire Peak District pulling my tyre.

The weather – Hot, clammy and sunny with very little wind.

The terrain – undulatingly brutal, muddy, boggy, lots of boulders to scramble over with my trye on my shoulder. Plenty of moments with my tyre getting stuck between small boulders on the rocky paths, interest hills and a route I haven’t walked before which requires map and navigation skills.

It’s a bit like life really!

Food intake – an understanding my body will burn between 5-6,000 calories, therefore lots of

nutrition required for my training day.

Fluid management – I took 6.3 litres of fluid. Why 6.3 litres? 6 litres of water and a can of coca cola. I know, Coca Cola is bad for you, but I like it!

I plan to get up a 3am Saturday morning, have my breakfast, go through my route and double check my kit for the day. My aim is to be off in the car by 4am with an approximate 1-hour drive to my destination. Start walking by 5am.

In bed for 10pm and I’m wide awake. I slept in! 3.15am I wake up and drag my rear end out of bed! Shower, teeth cleaned and ready for action, I relax over my breakfast.

My mind is questioning what on earth am I doing up at this time of day and I chuckle to myself. “get on with it Kattenberg” I say to myself. My Bear is muttering at me. Just like a grumpy teenager not wanting to do something.

I get distracted and eventually leave the house at 4:10am thinking the roads should be clear! I thought too soon. My first obstacle of the day! A detour due to overnight road works. This puts another 40 minutes on my journey. I begin to get a little frustrated as I know this will have a knock-on effect on my finishing time but soon relax to some calming music. My blood line is part Italian, and yes, I have a tendency to allow the Italian temperament to sneak through every so often! But I know how to control it, well most of the time lol!

If I average 3 miles per hour (mph) over 45 miles, it will take me approximately 15 hours excluding breaks. Which means if I start at 5am, I should be finished around 9pm; if I allow for a 1-hour break and can maintain the 3mph average speed.

5:45am I eventually begin my walk. I’m a little frustrated with the start time and just focus on looking forward to the sunset once I get out of the valley. My pace is initially fast and I’m averaging 4mph for the first 15km. It’s an easy surface. (The calm before the storm lol!)

I then hit my first unforgiving terrain section of the day. Stop start every 20 yards, tyre jarring and getting caught on boulders. I know it’s going to be a long day but I’m enjoying the experience.

Part of my route is not often used, and the shrubbery clearly shows! Checking my map, compass and every so often cross referencing with my gps device. All to ensure I am on track regardless of my ego telling me I’m going in the right direction.

I feel it’s very easy to just allow your ego to tell you that everything is fine, but in fairness, I believe it’s better to have milestone markers and systems in place to verify you’re on the right path etc, whether it be on a trek, personal, or in business or work life. Having systems in place merely helps you get to your destination even if you go off track at times.

The temperature is now getting very warm, and the air is clammy. I’m managing my water intake as it’s super warm pulling the tyre. It honestly feels like I’m in the Marathon Des Sables again!

I’ve got to the stage where I’m navigating around knee-deep boggy terrain and using my tyre as a bridge to step over at times. I know my 15-16-hour target has evaporated due to the terrain I’m on, but I’m still focused on hitting the 45-mile point.

Navigating sections where you can’t see 20 yards ahead, unless you climb above the drops, proves very time consuming. You can see from the image how deep the sections are. This is where you have to trust your process and skills, have safety catch points to ensure you maintain course and much more.

As you can see, it’s an interesting section of terrain.

As the day goes on, I settle into my stride and enjoy the scenery and experience, knowing my time target has gone out of the window! It’s now just about enjoying and completing the distance.

I’ve already met some nice people and had pleasant conversations. Only a few remarks about the tyre and where’s my car, did I forget something etc, not forgetting “Oooh you must be Tyred”.

Once again, I get to the point of responding to the question, what are you training for – A cold beer when I get back!

Before I know it, I’m well over the 40km mark into my day and it’s now early evening. To my pleased mind, as I enjoy a flat surface, I begin to jog pulling the tyre for 1 km, I start laughing with a brief thought to myself! “You daft bugger Jon, why are you jogging”. The sunset is to my left and I’m approaching Bar Tor and Loose Hill. The scenery is stunning, but I am very aware I’m just about run out of water with half a litre left.

It’s been super warm; I have had to drink fluids to ensure I remain hydrated. I had people in the past at times say, “Oh you don’t need that much fluid, as your body can cope with just one day” Mmmmm, all very well if your body is willing to suffer the next 3-5 days with dehydration. Not something I’m prepared to experience. Certainly not something I want to train my mind to do when taking on a 1,000-mile trek in arctic conditions. Very simply – dehydration = frost bite! Training is also about your mind, not just physical fitness/stamina.

Approaching Kinder Scout

I know the next 20km’s will be brutal due to the inclines and terrain. I look at my watch and figure it will be probably midnight before I get back. More importantly, I can tell I’m at risk getting dehydrated and have to make a decision.

I have 2 options;

1/ Be stubborn and egotistical and push for the whole 45 miles, knowing I am dehydrated and could risk causing injury to myself.

2/ Take a step back, alter my route so I can get to my car and ensure I can continue my training the next day with a walk in the Lake District?

What would you have done?

Once I considered my options, planned a different route, I took the decision to cut my training short. Instead of 45 miles, I decided to finish at 40 miles, slow my pace and take more breaks so I can continue the next day and be fit for another walk.

Sure enough, I slow my pace and break the next approximate 24km into sections. My water isn’t going to last and I manage my hydration intervals the best I can.

It’s approximately 10pm, and I open the boot of my car. I devour a bottle of water and prep my protein drink. I feel pleased with my decision to cut my route short. Yes, I could have continued through to midnight and pushed for 45 miles, but what would I have achieved? A dehydrated body? A next day of suffering walking around the Lake District?

When I take on my 1,000-mile trek in the Yukon and Alaska, my target is to average between 40-45 miles a day. There will be times where I may not achieve even the 40-mile distance in one day due to the conditions and terrain. That’s fine in my mind. Having the ability to decide whether I take rest and shelter can be the difference to successfully completing my trek, or failure!

Training your Bear to protect you on your journey of life can be the difference of having an amazing journey, or the experience of pain and discomfort.

Don’t be scared of taking a step back and planning different routes to your destination. It’s the journey that counts, and if you have the right systems in place, you may find yourself on a different route, but still get to your destination, smiling!

If you wish to discuss anything with Walking With My Bear, don’t hesitate, get in touch.

We’re also very happy to share other people’s journey and success stories within our community. If you have an interesting story you want to share, why not reach out to us.

Warmest wishes

Walking With My Bear

Addiction: ” A person who cannot control how they use a substance or partake in an activity, and they become dependent on it to cope with daily life”.

In more technical terms: “Addiction is a psychological and physical inability to stop consuming a chemical or drug, activity or substance, even though it is causing psychological and physical harm”. (Medical News Today)

I was sat on my thinking step and I thought…”what advice would be useful to someone in the depths of addiction, that I wish someone had told me at that desperate time?”

I really hope someone finds this useful. This is based on my own experiences, not scientific textbook stuff.

I had to take myself back to one of my lowest moments, June 2018 on the Psychiatric Ward. I had another “blip” after this. This was pre latest detox (which was my very lowest). Sadly “blips” happen, you learn from mistakes and all! As long as it is only a blip.

I was having a really tough time accepting that I wouldn’t be able to drink ever again. The thought of giving up alcohol forever was frightening, if I’m honest. This was because I believed (which I now realise was the illness talking) life would be boring without alcohol, and the following are just some of the thoughts you have to try and rationalise and overcome: –

I would be boring without alcohol, especially in social situations!

I’ll be socially awkward and restless without it.

My anxiety will be massive.

Is there such a thing as fun without alcohol?

It settles my nerves,

I have more confidence and care less what people think of me.

I like the “merry” feeling (who was I kidding, that feeling vanished years ago).

Drinking is everywhere, everyone does it.

Why am I finding it so hard to stop, I’m so weak?

I shouldn’t have let this happen, I’m a horrible person.

Guilt! Everything I’ve put my family and friends through.

How can I be honest about it all, it’s embarrassing?

I could pretend I was “ill” no one would know.

People will think I’m a weak, selfish, pathetic, heartless and a horrible person.

They’ll think I only care about myself, how could I do this to people that love me.

They’ll think “why has it happened to her, Jen has a nice life, loving family, a little boy.

SELFISH!

I’ll have to be careful what I say, and keep things bottled up when I’m struggling, they won’t understand.

This is when I recap the definition, “it Is An Illness” both physically and mentally

If you had another illness would any of those thoughts go through your head, probably not.

If you gave up smoking (I smoke, I’m no quitter!! Haha). One thing at once, which is an addiction, could you relate to any of those thoughts?

In reality, and I’m living proof that none and I mean NONE, of those statements are true. Ask yourself “where is the evidence that any of those statements are true”? It is unhelpful, negative thinking, that I completely made up. That’s part of the illness. I can see that now but at the time I believed it was true. I had almost convinced myself it was. But it takes time and practice (lots of), which is hard to accept when you are so desperate and want to be “normal”.

Please talk to Walking With My Bear, he has the ability to turn any negative thought/situation into something positive and realistic (I don’t know how they do it, some kind of sorcery). They make me realise that there is no logic behind my irrational thinking and I always end up thinking “I can’t actually believe I believed it”. Walking With My Bear allows you to metaphorically have a “lightbulb moment”. I’m still having these now, it’s a working progress.

Can you see a link between all those negative statements? They’re all to do with self-confidence, self-worth and my view on people’s expectations.

At Walking With My Bear, we did a lot of work on my confidence, self-esteem and anxiety issues, all of which are underrated. They are so important from social events to daily tasks. They were the biggest instigators behind my drinking.

Here are some helpful statements and food for thought (I hope) to counteract the negative ones, which I wish I had known in the early stages of my recovery…

Don’t think of recovery as something you’re giving up (ie alcohol, substances and certain behaviours) think of what you are gaining,

Try not telling yourself that you can’t have something as you will want it more,

Try see the addiction as a relationship (a toxic one!!), and it’s like a grieving process of the end of the relationship and you only remember the good bits. Even though the bad bits may outweigh the good.

I under-estimated the amount of anxiety/panic attacks, low confidence, low self-esteem that I’d experience in recovery. Ensure you have the correct support, knowledge and tools ready to deal with them. They have to be dealt with; it doesn’t go away until you do. These issues have been numbed for so long, but it’s natural to experience them even when you are not in recovery.

I now accept I’ll be in recovery for the rest of my life (although Walking With My Bear may explain and bring to my attention I won’t be!) which took years and several relapses to realise. Once I accepted this, it completely changed my mindset, I was so much mentally stronger.

This made me realise that I don’t agree with being labelled an alcoholic for the rest of my life. I’m not going to be known as anorexic or bulimic for the rest of my life. As with any other illness ‘I’ve previously had (had, being the operative word), they stay in the past. The reason why I don’t agree with being labelled, is because this reinforces a state of mind with an illness.

I use the phrase “I was alcohol dependent”. Using past tense, because that’s where it is staying. It doesn’t define me or who I am now. That was not me anyway, it was my illness. I AM NOT MY ILLNESS, neither are you.

It’s amazing the amount of people (family and friends) that already knew this and knew my negative thinking was irrational. They didn’t judge me; they knew it was the illness. Honestly, people understand more than you tell yourself. They didn’t judge me on my eating disorder so why did I think they would with my alcoholism? I just had a hard time accepting alcoholism was an illness too.

I am therefore encouraging anyone who is going through a similar situation to please, please, please believe me, this is an illness. It Is Not You.  People want to help; they want to understand and they actually empathise with you and most don’t judge. There is obviously the odd few that are jerks but why would you want a narrow-minded person in your life anyway? Reach out, there is so much help out there, but you need to accept the situation.

Be honest… with yourself and others, it gets you the correct support. Support is vital, even if it’s not to talk about your problems. Reach out.

Thanks for reading.  If you have any questions, I’m sure Walking With My Bear will have no problem with passing them on to me. I have more wisdom to pass on. You are not alone.

Warmest wishes

Jenny x

Walking through the mist is something I personally enjoy. Especially when out training in the countryside and walking distances, for over 50km, pulling a tyre, and for many hours.

At present I’m training to walk unsupported, 1,000 miles across parts of the Yukon and Alaska. Across frozen rivers, lakes, through forests and ice roads. I’ll even be walking for approximately 15 hours a day and often through the dark. I’ll be walking through the countryside where bears will be hibernating (hopefully) and with wolves that at times can be curious and inquisitive! There could even be what we call “Whiteouts” where the snow and weather is so dense, you can’t see very far (that’s a bit like not knowing your journey of life). You have to trust your navigation skills and have a strong robust mindset on an unconscious level.

Any glitch within your mindset, to work with the environment, could expose you to unwanted stress, anxiety and lead to mistakes with potentially catastrophic results/outcomes. This is where training your mind becomes your number one priority.

So yes, I need to be physically fit, I think it’s fair to say, it’s a must if I want to enjoy the journey. But if my mind isn’t trained to work with the variables and keep navigating me on my journey, then there is a risk that bad things could happen! 

That said, not everyone wants to go out and walk within the wilderness where bears may be lingering! But your life journey is also an expedition. You may or may-not have a plan, vision, goal, aspiration etc, but it’s fair to say, no-one really has a crystal ball at hand that can tell them what will happen exactly throughout their future years. If you don’t have control over your mind, guess what? Your “Bear” will take control of you!

Some say “Can’t see the wood for the Trees”.

The challenge a person has is that they may feel overwhelmed, as if they are climbing out of a big hole. Not only have they got to pull themselves out of the hole, they’re struggling to see their future and what good looks like.

People say to keep focusing on what good looks like, think positive thoughts, do incantations and much more, even to the point of others expressing how they have achieved a perceived level of mental success. Yet, One size doesn’t fit all! People have different thought processes and patterns.

We at Walking With My Bear, feel it is very important to understand the programming of the mind before you begin trying to clear the mist.

I’d like to share an example of a structured approach to understanding why your mind feels like it cannot see what good looks like, or the true potential of what you can really achieve. It’s designed to give you a starting point where you can adapt it to your own self.

Step 1

• You may have a million and one things going on in your mind right now. This can cause mist in the mind whether it be consciously, or even on a deep unconscious level. Write down all the things on your mind. This will help you to release some of the mist. It’s about your ability to free your mind of the overwhelming thoughts clouding your vision.

Step 2

• Prioritise what is essential and must be done straight away from the list you have just created. Once you have prioritized your list, leave for 5-10 minutes. Go for a walk or go make a cuppa, etc, then go back to it and reflect to see if the order of priority is right. If not, adjust and reflect again.

Step 3

• Create a timeframe of when things need to be done by. Draw a line from one side of the paper to the other. Then write the things that need to be done in order and then put times and dates on them.

Step 4

• Complete the exercise in the previous blog – “Can we Control the Controllables”. Once you have completed the task, you will then be able to see what you can focus on.

Step 5

• Now write or draw your vision of the desired outcome you would like to see for yourself; having achieved the things you desire.

Step 6

• Write a plan. If you’re struggling to create a plan, reach out for help. Maybe consider getting in touch with Walking With My Bear. You never know, we may be able to help you.

Step 7

• Reflect to see if you need help or support. If you do require help or support, reach out. Either communicate with someone you trust who is qualified and experienced, or by all means, reach out to Walking With My Bear. We’d be very happy to support you

We hope this simple exercise helps you on your journey and taking back control of your bear.

Warmest wishes

Walking With My Bear

Can we really control the controllables without first exploring the programming of our mind?

A question we ask people before exploring the things an individual can control and then influence.

Some say focus on the things you can influence, and the things you can’t influence, well, let them take effect your told whilst you focus on the things you can influence! But is there something missing in this process?

Please allow us to explain some key points of consideration.

In many aspects of the personal development and coaching world, people/clients are encouraged to focus on the things they can control. Which to an extent is correct.

However, we raise a simple question. What if your programming of your mind, including your “Bear” has a different idea of what you can control and what you can’t influence?

It’s a common essential key factor that is often missed.

We explored in a previous article/blog about how your “Bear” has a “Locus of Control” which I’ll come onto shortly. But first, we need to understand your perception of what you can and can’t control or influence

The first part of the exercise is very simple.

Get a A4 piece of paper

1/ Get a A4 piece of paper  and draw a circle. Inside write “Things I can absolutely control”. Ensure the circle is large enough so you can write stuff in.

Now write inside the circle, key things you feel you can influence.

Example: – I can set my alarm to notify me at a specific time. I can drink water by filling my glass from the tap. I can ask for help. I can breath, etc etc. Naturally make it specific to the key areas you want to address. It’s good to put some easy things in that you can influence to help you along with the exercise at the beginning.

2/ Draw another circle around the first circle which allows you to write “What I can Influence”.  Allow a large enough gap so that you can write the things you can influence.

Now write in the area between the two circles, things you feel you can influence, yet don’t feel you have full control of the outcome.

Example: – I can try my best at work but my performance may not be up to my manager’s expectation.

I can be polite to someone, but they may not be as polite back to me.

I can smile at someone passing but they may not smile back.

I can try to be positive by focusing on happy outcomes.

I don’t have anyone to speak about my thoughts actions and feelings, but I can if I wish, reach out for help.

I hope you get the principle of what I am showing as an example.

3/ Write on the outside of the large circle “Things I feel I cannot influence”  This is the area that allows you to write down all the things you feel you cannot influence.

Write all the things you feel you cannot influence.

Example: – I cannot influence the weather, therefore I can take a coat if it’s raining to best deal with the situation.

I feel anxious and can’t stop how I feel.

I feel stressed and don’t know how to stop feeling stressed.

I don’t know how to ask for help.

Naturally make it specific to the key areas you want to address, but it’s good to put some easy things in that you can influence to help you along with the exercise.

Look at the exercise in the article “Is Your Bear Controlling Your Ability to Take Ownership”. Have a look at your locus of control. The scale is on a 1-10 basis. 

If you have an internal locus of control you will be on the lower number (1-3). If you are on the higher number of the scale (7-10), you may find your “Bear” is guiding you to believe there are lots of things you cannot control or influence. If you’re somewhere in the middle (4-6) you’re pretty balanced on taking ownership of outcomes in your life and business.

It’s important to understand, there is no right or wrong with where you are on the scale, but to understand where you are on the scale allows you to work with the programming of your mind more effectively.

Without understanding the above, you may just be applying a sticky plaster approach to your thoughts actions and feelings  towards what you can and can’t control/influence.

Once you understand the above, then examine your original points written down, and then consider reaching out if you need support.

Warmest wishes

Walking With My Bear

“The art of understanding how you can control the controllables, is first understand your minds’ perception of what you can and can’t control or influence. Without this first step, you’ll simply run the risk of misleading yourself!”

Walking With My Bear

A question I often get asked. So many people asking how I train for such an adventure and is it hard!

Some feel it’s more about my physical fitness than mental fitness, some think otherwise where it’s mainly about mental fitness. For the majority, their opinion is honest speculation, or they may have read a book! How would they know if they have never pushed themselves beyond the norm? It’s a bit like someone giving you advice about something you want to achieve, and they haven’t even tried or succeeded themselves at whatever it is you are setting out to achieve!

If I’m being totally honest, I don’t have the equipment to measure the difference between mental and physical.

However, what I can tell you is, each part has a role to play, and I want to put a metaphorical situation to you;

A technique for harnessing your emotions to your advantage;

Close your eyes, and imagine for a second that someone or something in your life who means everything to you, needs your help. They are stranded hundreds of miles away and you have to get to them urgently. 

All public and personal transportation has broken down and you have to walk to them.

You have never walked or run hundreds of miles. Potentially never run or walked a marathon. yet you know that if you don’t reach them, the worst case scenarios could happen to them, and failure is not an option. Your mind has told you that you will make this journey and not even think twice about. Before you even realise it, your subconscious mind has taken control!

But hang on a minute, what do you do? Your conscious mind, plus your fight or flight system may also be kicking in. Instructing you to consider standing back and saying your goodbye to them. Afterall your conscious mind knows you’ve never run or walked the distance and you’re certainly not fit enough in your conscious mind.

Then your emotions begin to kick in and say otherwise. Instructing you to get on your feet, prepare for the journey and once you have all you need, then set off with abolsute intent on getting to your loved one no matter what it takes. Your emotions are now beginning to overide your logic. You don’t care, because you love them so much, you would move mountains to get to them (metaphorically of course).

Yes, for most people, saying a final goodbye is not an option, with the only option being, to get to their loved one regardless of the perceived journey ahead.

Now imagine you are applying your emotions to your goals, aims and objectives in life.

Your approach to your journey of life can be very siimilar if you choose to engage your powerful emotional drivers within you. Often eradicating any limiting beliefs, social conditioning, phobias, bad habits and much more. 

How you connect with your emotions on a deep powerful level is where training your mind requires practice and correct guidance and support in a way that suits you. Remember, everyone is different, so it’s not a one size fits all approach to training your mind. You need to understand your programming first.

Insight to my mindset when training;

So to give you an example of my training for walking 1,000 miles in extreme conditions in the Yukon and Alaskan wilderness does require plenty of physical training if I want my journey to be enjoyable. Whilst writing part of this artcile, it’s 5pm Friday 24th July 2020 and I will be getting up at 4am in the morning. Breakfast and a 1 hour drive to walk 26 miles pulling my trye across unforgiving terrain and hills. As you can imagine, at times my mind can scream at me telling me to stop not only within the first 10 minutes of training but at various points. 

Guess what, I tell my bear ( my mind) where to go! If I don’t train my body, there is every chance that my first few days or week on the 1,000 mile arctic trek, whilst my body adapts will be painful, mentally draining, and potentially run the risk of an injury.

Some say I’m lucky to have a mindset that can be so determined. I say I created it this way through understanding my mind and working a proven process I practice with clients.

So what is equally important, is my daily training on my mind, even though I have studied, applied and practiced mindset techniques for many years. I never take it for granted and continue to practice daily! 

A mix of mindful programming, visualisation, mental strategy planning, meditation and much more every day. Yes, my mind can sometimes try and tell me that I’m mad, reckless and crazy. I mean, I have enough people around me telling me that anyway, so why wouldn’t my mind tell me otherwise. After all, this is the effect of social conditioning at it’s best. Other people imposing their outlook on life and limiting beliefs upon you. The crazy thing is that 99% of the people telling me it’s reckless, crazy, pointless and much more, are people who don’t do much themselves. This is not an attack on them, it’s just their way in life, but I refuse to allow others to influence my passion for adventure however big or small. 

If you have a dream, goal or ambition etc, yes listen to what’s being said by people who have achieved or demonstrate success in the area you are striving to succeed within. But don’t allow those that haven’t or don’t pursue a life achieving the things you are setting out to ahieve to tell you otherwise.

So, when things begin tough, the important thing is connecting with your emotional intent, which can lead to you eradicating habits that no longer serve you, your desire for change and success and much more. 

How you may ask, do you connect with your emotional driver?

Start with a simple exercise and set yourself off for success, understand where you are wanting to go, what are you wanting to achieve, what it will feel like when you have achieved it. Also look at the potential variables, influencers in your life both positive and negative, your strategy and plan of action. Then imagine teh emotions you will feel completing  your goal. Be prepared to adapt along the way. 

Yes, for many, they may need to understand their key drivers for wanting to achieve xyz. You may even want to look at your programming of your mind, but this is just a starting point to get you going. I’d naturally encourage gaining a deeper understanding of your mind. This way you can take yourself to the next level if you desire.

So, when I begin walking 1,000 miles, whilst I have my eyes on the destination, I’m also fully alert for change along the journey and ready to adapt to the environment. I’ll explain in my next blog about training your mind for adaptability and working with the unknown curve balls of life.

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Warmest wishes

Walking With My Bear.