Working with Metaphors with clients amongst the outdoors!

Recently I assessed 4 practitioners who had gone through the practitioner training program of Navigate Your Future under www.LifeWealthCoaching.com. We worked around the Watkins Path area.

For those that know the initial section of the Watkins Path below Snowdon, walkers are soon greeted by the prominent mounted plaque on the famous Gladstone rock. 

The Prime Minister many years ago delivered a speech on Justice for Wales, not to mention sung some ‘Cymric hymns’ himself. 

A plaque fitted to the front of the boulder commemorating what was sure to have been a memorable occasion, announcing that indeed William Gladstone had stood upon the rock. 

As we know, Gladstone once stood on and gave his ceremonious speech to the working class about rights and how he would bring change.

A profound moment where many lives were suffering and often hit with devastating curve balls resulting in many years of hardship and suffering from the loss of a loved one working on the slate quarries in Wales. Yet, a wise person would stand strong and proud and provide answers to many questions. A point where some would look up to Gladstone for wise answers and leadership when they lack internal leadership, courage, or the answers they are looking for.

It is alleged an audience of approximately 2000 stood below Prime Minister Gladstone whilst he addressed the audience.

It’s interesting to see how just the above can be used to work in a metaphorical way whilst empowering a client to overcome their mindset challenge.

Let’s break this down.

It is believed the Watkin Path originates from Sir Edward Watkin back in 1892, a Liberal Member of Parliament and railway entrepreneur. Sir Watkin retired and moved to a chalet around Cwm Llan. Sir Watkin was eager to build a path from the quarry to Snowdon’s summit, allowing visitors to reach the famous peak. The Path was the first designated footpath in Britain and officially opened in 1892 by prime minister Gladstone

A prominent figure himself, Sir Watkin provides the opportunity of many metaphors.

Sometimes our minds can be set in old thoughts actions and feelings, ultimately deeply rooted within neural pathways of our mind.

Here we have Sir Watkin creating a new route to achieve a successful summit of Snowdon across what can only be described as a challenging walk for many and leading the way for others to follow! Just like their own path and journey in life where they pursue the light for a way forward through dark challenging times.

A new path can be a new neural pathway to new ways of being or thoughts perceptions and beliefs and can stand the test of time if done properly. Also, with a prominent figure leading the way which can provide courage and inspiration to others to take on new paths in life etc etc.

Although there are many opportunities ascending the initial section as you approach the disused incline on the steep banking to your left, as you approach Cwm Llan waterfalls, the flow of water through the stones offers so many metaphors. 

Deep routed hidden or tried to be forgotten experiences can creep up through the mind at any given point, especially when we are mentally tired as our defences weaken. This has many similarities to PTSD, phobias, unwanted habits and much more, with many trying to find ways to cope. 

The plunge swirl pools collecting water and eventually flowing over to the pool below, trapping stones at the bottom and only allowing the surface water to pass. This can be like working with coping straggles to avoid going deep to remove or change what is lying at the bottom of your mind, still there with your mind reminding you every so often. Sometimes at the most inconvenient time!

If we take the concept of flowing water, just like water flowing through the stones and boulders, it ultimately will find a way through at some point if not addressed properly. If a new route with firm strong foundations and boundaries is created, the water can help wash away aspects of the mind (on the basis the original problem/challenge is reframed).

For some people, working with metaphors around traumatic experiences can help bring inner peace and a way of finding a new route to a more positive way of thinking as long as, the underlying cause is resolved. Otherwise, the metaphors just become coping strategies. This process naturally requires experience to work with PTSD, but if done efficiently, clients can overcome PTSD effectively whilst being in the outdoors with a specialist.

As you go past the final waterfall, you have two options. Turn left and ascend, or you approach a bridge. 

Each option offering multiple metaphors.

Ascend left just past the last waterfall, and you could bring the story of Moses into the walk by telling a story just prior to the turning left. 

Moses as we know would ascend the mountains to reach a wise person for answers. Ok we won’t have any burning bushes or begin walking down with tablets of stone with written commandments in our hands, but a client can often find answers from an imaginary person or figure. Especially as you ascend there is a winding path onto the disused incline track. From here you make your way directly up the slight re-entrant where there are a couple of old structures and cave with tunnels that lead in and out. 

Here a client could look for answers, look how far they have come and how great the pathway down looks with beautiful scenery and history. 

The metaphors at this point become vast. The client is returning with answers, the pathway is downhill which is easier than the ascent and often their minds’ clear of the mist/fog effect allowing them to enjoy how far they have come and much more with clarity in their mind. If it is literally misty, raining with poor visibility, this is even greater given you can be guided to safety, yet being allowed to navigate with a little support. This provides insight to your ability to guide through challenging times even when you may not initially see a way forward through the mist/fog. 

Imagine having found answers and mental resolution to a given situation without being able to see where you are going?

Back to the route. Instead of turning left, another option is to proceed to the bridge just in front.

Providing you with safety to cross over water. For some, this may remind them of the song by Simon and Garfunkel with the infamous song - Bridge over Troubled Water. As we know, the song references a way forward over of challenging times, just like being able to walk over flowing water without the risk of being swept away and overwhelmed with risk and fear etc.

Very soon you approach an old derelict building which the military used to use as target practice on the right-hand side.

As you observe the numerous bullet holes, it’s like a dot to dot of any experience, thought, actions, feelings, perceptions, beliefs, habits and much more. How our programming of our mind connects our past to everything we are in the here and now. With prior work with yourself understanding your mind etc and certain techniques being applied and practiced, this offers a perfect place to bring a visual transformation process to the mind where you can visualise a new route map of the dot to dot of bullet holes and metaphorically relate it to new neural pathways or thoughts actions and feelings etc.

As you proceed ahead reaching Gladstone Rock, this provides a place where an individual if trained would know this rock represents a place where a perceived wise person once stood. Suddenly as you approach, working with a metaphorical process, you are walking towards a place where a wise person in your mind may be waiting to answer any question.

A steady walk and one that is achievable by many means regardless of the weather, this initial section alone offers so much opportunity to work metaphorically with a client around mental performance and mental therapy that goes beyond mental health first. 

Conclusion

Regardless of where you are, understanding how to apply the outdoors and our routes which we have researched clearly offer so many opportunities around mindset therapy and performance amongst the outdoors. 

It’s important to remember that mental wellbeing isn’t about just therapy, it’s also key to mental performance and something I truly enjoy not only empowering private clients with, but also training others to help even more amazing people.

For some the outdoors presents itself as a way of escapism. For others, it offers itself towards mental performance for long lasting results. For me, it’s a respectful and professional playground of immense opportunity to work with and empower a client to a more enjoyable and fulfilling way of life.

If you would like to know more, please don’t hesitate and get in touch.

Warmest wishes

Jonathan

Founder of Walking With My Bear

Following my success of working with clients amongst the outdoors, during this podcast with Peter Mabbutt - Head of Academics at LSCCH, we explore the benefits to not only the therapist but equally clients when working amongst the outdoors.

Throughout this podcast, we discuss the amazing journey of Jenny. How the therapeutic process has helped transform her life.

To listen to the podcast, just click on the link below.

If you would like to know more details, whether it be how to become an outdoor therapist, or to book a discovery call to explore options on how we can help you, just get in touch and we'll arrange a mutually convenient time to have a chat to see how we may be able to help you on the next stage of your journey.

https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-therapycast-vol-3-no-21/id839453129?i=1000551737468

Challenging times

My background

I have been working with Jonathan with very intense therapy for a while now. If you haven’t read my previous blogs I will briefly outline my previous struggles. 

Alcohol dependency and eating disorders. I had an eating disorder for over 2 decades and became alcohol dependent for about 3 years up until 2 years ago. 

Both of these addictions almost took my life. Sadly I had got to the point where I wasn’t bothered if it did.

At the time, my addiction chose alcohol and lack of eating over my own son, family and friends. 

That’s addiction, it doesn’t discriminate. Situations in the past get interpreted by each individual differently and people react differently. By this, I mean that while one person wouldn’t be bothered about an event in the past, another could be quite affected by it or affected by words. 

So there has been a lot of therapy around my past to overcome this. Other services had briefly brushed over and not challenged my mindset which is why it has been going on so long until Jonathan stepped in.

I’ll be honest, with all the intensive treatment I was receiving there were moments where I thought, “is this working? What’s the point? Am I ever going to be ‘fixed’? How long does this take”? 

Reflecting and taking the decision for change

The challenge with instant gratification and being in the height of addiction is what I feel is craved as an instant fix. That “fix” is only short term and I had to accept recovering would take time. 

I had “practiced” my heavy drinking for long enough, it was time to accept what’s happened, take ownership and practice the tools I had learnt to get better. I didn’t get it right straight away, I messed up but I learnt from it and sometimes had to try a different approach. 

There’s a good old cliché “practice makes perfect”, I even say it to my 7 year old son, and getting your life under your control and actually having a life is totally worth it. Life can be scary, unpredictable, chaotic, highs and lows but with the right mindset and use of effective mindset tools YOU CAN get through anything. 

I have, and since being sober/eating well, recently had the most challenging experience to date. In fact, it’s still not over and for the first time in my life I'm using effective skills instead of turning to drink or restricted eating. 

Why it’s so important to Secure Your Tectonic Plates of Your Mind (as Jonathan would put it!)

Here’s the recent situation….

Saturday 16^th October. Wedding dress shopping with my bridesmaids and my mum. Had a great day out, meal etc, oh…found the dress. However in the back of my mind I couldn’t help worrying about my son, Bob (still not actually called Bob), he’d been off school for 2 days being sick and laid up on the sofa. 

Normally this kid never stops, we do loads of active things together. On my return from the exciting day out, a rash had appeared on Bob. Without giving it 2 thoughts (of my past reservations about going to hospital and being stuck there) I rang an ambulance and packed a bag at the same time. I knew something wasn’t right.  

Let’s just say in the height of my addiction and eating disorder, my own hospital experience was not a very good one and I probably wasn’t the ideal patient, which led me to getting sectioned. 

Why I Know My Tectonic Plates have been Secured!

Bearing in mind 2 years ago, my addiction would have chosen alcohol over my son!

On this occasion my whole world stopped, nothing mattered other than getting Bob sorted. My usual routine of exercise and set meal times which helps me stay sober and eating well, went out the window but I knew I would be OK. 

I fought to get him sorted. I experienced feelings (which I would have previously tried to numb in very unhelpful ways), emotions, anxiety, sadness, guilt, hopelessness, nervous energy and very lonely and there was nowhere to go to “switch off”. 

We were in and out of hospital for over a month then we contracted Covid, which was a kick in the teeth. I can honestly now tell you what got me through this. 

Jonathan and myself have done so much work together. One aspect was to strengthen my mind using certain techniques attaching emotional drivers to what I wanted to achieve. My emotional drivers were trained to kick the ass out of alcohol and food issues, and all of a sudden I was now in hospital with a rare auto-immune disease impacting on my son. My emotional driver used was Bob. 

Another technique used was to train my mind to take the batton as if I was in a relay race against my past self.

Jonathan would get me to imagine I was on an athletic race track. I would imagine Jonathan racing against my old dark self to start with. Jonathan would do a lap and I would take the Baton and begin racing. At first my old self would catch me up. 

Over time after practice and attachment of emotional drivers, I became so mentally strong, I did not need Jonathan on the race track with me. I would just look at the old self on the other race track lane and make it clear it no longer threatened my life, nor could it beat me. I would and still smash it into the ground if my metaphorical old self even thought it could take me on!

The anger and emotions I felt towards my issues getting between me and Bob became so strong (after practice) I am now over 2 years sober. This vision and attached feelings empowered my mind and enabled me to stay strong, focused be there for Bob, and get through it with whatever cards are dealt!

Reflecting

I realise the situation with Bob could have gone one of two ways, but I have practiced to achieve a strong mindset and I got through it. There would have been a time previously when that situation would have brought back a lots of feelings around being in hospital but I took control of the situation, didn’t panic. Even when the word “meningitis” got thrown around. I stayed strong for him. 

I’ve found it’s the build up to something that creates the anxiety, the not knowing, the things I tell myself in my head, it’s all made up nonsense.

Even though it is still ongoing it is rewarding to be writing this, and I can look back at my previous unhelpful behavior and know, that’s not me anymore. Writing this has also reminded me how useful the tools are, not only to get you through addiction (for example) but to have the ability to be strong for unexpected life situations. 

Looking back, I would have found the above information quite vital the people helping you don’t have grey hairs for nothing. If I could sum up this article in one word it would be- Believe.

If you want to learn more about overcoming Anxiety, Alcoholism and eating disorders, please get in touch.

Whenever I work with clients, I ask them to complete an exercise I call the 5As. It’s a key element for clients working through different sections in my book “How To Build On Tectonic Plates” or personalised manual I provide my clients.

The purpose of the exercise

The purpose of this exercise is to establish an understanding of your current situation. It involves looking at what has happened in the past, whether you acknowledge that past and how it has influenced you in respect of your thought’s actions and feelings. 

It also helps you to break down the change you may need to make, by looking at the actions required and how you can measure your progress.

The process then leads you to position your mind as if you have ultimately achieved the journey and desired successful outcome or change. 

Gaining clarity

Far too often clients go straight the visualising process only to find things don’t materialise over time. By applying the above process, this empowers your mind with the knowledge and understanding of what needs to be done.

It can support clarity, eradication of procrastination, unwanted stress, anxiety and much more.

My 5As principle incorporates: Ability to Acknowledge, Ability to Accept, Ability to Agree, Ability to Act, and Ability to Achieve. 

Below is just an insight to some of the questions a client is encouraged to reflect and answer:

Acknowledge

What do you choose to acknowledge about yourself in respect of your mindset?

What do you need to acknowledge about your current financial affairs?

Accept 

What is it that you need to accept?

Do you need to accept action is required? and what needs to be achieved?

Agree

What is it you need to agree?

Act

What action do you need to take?

Is it measurable?

Achieve

What achievements key milestone markers have you noted?

How do you think or feel your emotional state of being will be once you have achieved your desired outcome?

Are you willing to take action?

If you would like to know more about how I support clients with their mind and wealth, don’t delay, just reach out and get in touch.

I’m sure you will have heard this before, but if you keep doing the same, you will continue get the same outcome. 

If you truly want to make change, then take action and get in touch.

Warmest wishes

Jonathan

My Reason for Fundraising

Focus4Hope provide much needed support to their community. Supporting homeless, victims of social abuse, vulnerable people and the elderly. They have become a vital life line to many individuals and families and need a support worker to help meet the growing demand.

Insight to creating the music, lyrics and video

The piece of music I wrote and recorded was back in 2012/2013 if I recall. It was a tune I felt expressed my frustrations with society and everything that was going on and building up to which we now witness in present day life. How fitting that I find myself using it to bring awareness to hopefully bring change, fingers crossed. 

I also used children in this as it portrays the “inner child” of an individual and how for some, they can lose sight of their passion for life they once had as a child...

Why I chose not to speak

Over the years of working with private clients around their mindset, for many people they feel their voice won't be understood. For this reason they tend to hold back from reaching out for help. Lose sight of the goals, dreams and aspirations whilst settling for second best.

This in turn can have impacts on an individual's mental wellbeing, and for some can lead to shutting down from many aspects in life. Some of which include leaving home, quitting work, depression and much more

Please can I ask, if you are able, visit www.walkingwithmybear.com/fundraising and click on the donate button to support my cause.

If you would like to be kept up to date of our work supporting Focus4Hope and other great causes, please click on the subscribe button and register. We'll keep you updated over time

Mindset, Professionalism and Integrity - Helping you build a solid mindset

Do people impose their own limiting beliefs on you?

I want to share an extract from an article I wrote a couple of years ago, which I feel is very pertinent in current times. Especially given many people’s perception of the uncertainty of COVID, the economic challenge, global political implications and restrictions as well as the thoughts of uncertainty of the unknown.

So, it was day 10 of a countdown to a 430 Artic Foot Race back in December 2018:

The Amazing support of the NHS

“The day before writing this blog on the 29th December 2018, I was advised to go to the A&E department at the local hospital to get checked out, after calling the non-emergency helpline. My breathing peak flow had gone from being in the late 600’s down to under 300 and things weren’t right. I had certainly just gone through a very challenging period of my life, which took not only physical but also a lot of mental energy to say the least. My body was trying to force me to stop as it was a little exhausted to say the least.

The great news was that after various tests and x ray’s etc, the medical specialists gave me the ‘all clear’. My mind was trying to work overtime figuring out what was wrong with my heart and breathing!

I was so grateful for the loving wishes of a swift recovery which I received whilst in hospital at that time. God knows what it would be like today given the strain on the NHS due to COVID. 

One thing did stand out and reminded me of some of the comments/remarks I have received over the last 12-18 months.

What I’m referring to is how a number of people, who know me, had recommended that I should slow down, ease off, take it easy for a while, question my why and much more, back in 2018.” 

The same can be said of today, 2 years later.

I understand that they are trying to look out for me, however, what I feel is essential to recognise, is the platform, their own experience or position in life, that they are making their views from. 

Please understand, I am not ungrateful for the love I have received in any way whatsoever, I am truly grateful.

However, we are all implicitly and explicitly conditioned from not just ourselves, but those around us and social media influence, of course.

To get to the point, if someone is advising you to slow down, ease off, take a break, etc, is that person passing on their wisdom from their own outlook and experience of life? If so, is that person actually pushing themselves beyond their own perceived limits, or are they constantly staying within their own comfort zone? Why does this matter you may ask? I’ll come to this later on.

Challenging those who give you guidance and advice!

Don’t be scared to ask them about their own experience of being in the same situation. You may be surprised to find that they have no experience whatsoever! I feel myself steering towards the latter, where most opinions expressed are from minds that don’t actually go beyond their own comfort zone. 

This can also be from people who hold certain academic qualifications on paper, but in the real world don’t know, nor have any real life experience of the magnitude of an undertaking such as my 1,000 mile unsupported arctic trek. We all have a 1,000 mile trek/journey in us. It just looks a bit different for each person.

Warning/word of advice - if you are looking to work with a Life/Mindset Coach for 2021 and beyond, is that person walking the talk, do they actually have the experience and qualifications?

Validating the experience and techniques by anyone who tries to guide you!

I was once approached to attend a course with a claim it could excel my endurance abilities to a whole new level, and prepare me for the Arctic challenges, and all for the price of a few hundred pounds. 

With an open mind, when researching and digesting their claims, it was clear that the alleged claims of their workshop were completely unfounded nor supported by medical evidence, or were experienced in endurance, nor were they living an endurance lifestyle. 2 years later and the same is still happening.

We all have a choice in our lifestyle, which I have no issue with, but if someone wants to make claims to a certain mindset practice or fitness training, yet, aren’t walking the talk in the present time and moment, nor have the experience, you have to question their integrity and ensure you don’t get conned out of money, nor be miss-led! Be careful people. I feel very passionate about this.

So, when reflecting after coming out of hospital in December 2018, my experience increased my passion, drive, tenacity and determination to push even stronger, albeit wiser, whilst I pursued my dreams, ambitions and goals. This to me, is a way of living, I know no other way. I may not get it right every time! I’m human for goodness sake. But I learn, adapt, strive through life with a fluid approach and remain determined, just like water flowing, to find the most appropriate path for my journey in life.

Sharing my thoughts...

I wanted to share my thoughts and hope that this encourages you to go out there and Iive beyond your comfort zone. Please don’t stay within it. Go out and live and don’t be scared of falling. Failure only ever occurs if you quit on life. Falling down doesn’t mean we have failed, it just means we need to get up, brush the dust off and try again. Just like when we first started to learn to ride a bike. When we fell, we got back up and tried again. 

Eventually we rose victoriously with a smile and a sense of joy like nothing else! As a child we knew no different and everyone around us encouraged us to get back up and try again. 

That said, in the adult world, it seems very acceptable to quit once you have tried a couple of times.

Fast forward to the present moment - Dec 2020

Fast forward to today. I now find myself in my final 2 months of hard training before I ease off for my 1,000-mile unsupported trek in arctic conditions. I hold the past experience of the last 3 years of unsuccessful attempts of completing the challenges in mind. Yet, this just merely fuels my burning desire to succeed even more as I find success in the experience!

When visualising your dreams, think about what you truly desired as a child, and ask yourself, are you living the dream you once thought about? If not, spend time reflecting and “Acknowledging” on the dream you once had. “Accept” it and “Attach” the emotional drive to it. Create an “Action” plan. “Agree” to begin and then go out and “Achieve”. Learn to apply my 5A’s referred to within my book ‘How To Build On Tectonic Plates’. I can honestly say it works not just for me, but for many of my clients.

Don’t let others tell you to slow down, especially if they live within their own comfort zones!

Don’t let others tell you to slow down, especially if they live within their own comfort zones! I still get at least once or twice a month people telling me to slow down, relax a little because I’m now 50. Do not get me wrong, I have more people in my world excited for me and full of encouragement.

I’m a believer that to love and care for someone, is to allow them to be free to live the life they truly desire, and support them, not oppress them with limiting ways of being.

It’s when we push ourselves beyond our perceived limitations, that we truly achieve in life and find out what we are actually made of. When we do this, we enter the unknown and it’s how we also adapt to the new experience. 

Utilising the door technique I created can be a perfect accompaniment to training your mind in this area. You just need to understand the process, understand what other doors may open and how to work with unplanned thoughts, actions and feelings.

For me, I look forward and certainly don’t hold back. If anything, I push harder.

Wishing you all an amazing life.

Warmest wishes

Jonathan

#Success #Inspire #Achieve #Passion #Life #Enjoylife